Weddings by Dan    -Rev. F Daniel Latour

Consider Personal Letters
Many couples attempt to write their own vows then realize there is no way they could get through it during the emotional rush of the ceremony.  Consider writing brief letters to each other and having them read during the ceremony.  The letters should say why, out of all the possible people in the world, you have chosen to marry each other. Often weddings are for show. The sacredness is somehow lessened by the glitz and costs. But when couples write letters, they often touch a deeper place. Their effort to be honest and genuine for one another is honored by God and made personal and completely authentic. Through their own words, the couple essentially writes their own sermon about life, love and their expectations of marriage. They add a personal touch much like self-written vows.  And for those who have children, someday those letters can be a really valuable gift. The letters can reveal more about a couple's individual personalities and tell the story about what's really going on between hearts. 

On Love and Friendship     by Roy Croft
I love you, not for what you are, but what I am, when I am with you.
I love you not only for what you have made of yourself, but what you are making of me.
I love you for the part of me that you bring out.
I love you for putting your hand into my heaped up heart and passing over all the frivolous and weak things that you cannot help seeing there, and for drawing out into the light all the beautiful and radiant things that no one else has looked quite far enough to find...
I love you because you have done more than any creed could have done to make me good, and more than any fate could have done to make me happy.
You have done it without a touch, without a word, without a sign. You have done it by being yourself.
 

1 Corinthians 13   (For 1 or 2 readers)
If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. If I give all I possess to the poor, and surrender my body to the flames, but have not love, I gain nothing. Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil, but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away.  When I was a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me. Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known. And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.

Hands Ceremony (Combined short version. See long version on Ceremonies Page. This version may be read by a guest reader or the Officiant.)
Bride and Groom, please face each other and take each other’s hands, so that you may see the gift that they are to you. These are the hands of your best friend, young and strong and full of love for you, that are holding yours on your wedding day as you promise to love each other today, tomorrow and forever. These are the hands that will work along side yours as together you build your future. These are the hands that will passionately love you and cherish you through the years, and with the slightest touch will comfort you like no other. These are the hands that will hold you when fear or grief temporarily comes your way. These are the hands that will countless times wipe the tears from your eyes, tears of sorrow and tears of joy. These are the hands that will tenderly hold your children. These are the hands that will give you support and encouragement to chase down your dreams. These are the hands that will hold you tight as you struggle through difficult times. These are the hands that will give you strength when you need it. These are the hands that will lift your chin and brush your cheek as they raise your face to look into eyes that are filled with overwhelming love for you. And lastly, these are the hands that even when wrinkled and aged will still be reaching for yours, still giving you the same unspoken tenderness with just a touch. These are your hands.

Song of Solomon 2:10-13
My beloved responded and said to me, 'Arise, my darling, my beautiful one, And come along. For behold, the winter is past, The rain is over and gone.   'The flowers have already appeared in the land; The time has arrived for pruning the vines, And the voice of the turtledove has been heard in our land. 'The fig tree has ripened its figs, And the vines in blossom have given forth their fragrance. Arise, my darling, my beautiful one, And come along!'

Mark 10:6-9 (usually placed at end of ceremony with final blessing)
From the beginning of creation God made them male and female. For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and cleave to his wife; and they shall be one flesh: so then they are no more twain, but one flesh.
What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder.

How Do I Love Thee
     ~ By Elizabeth Barrett Browning ~
How do I love thee? Let me count the ways.
I love thee to the depth and breadth and height
My soul can reach, when feeling out of sight
For the ends of Being and ideal Grace.
I love thee to the level of every day's
Most quiet need, by sun and candlelight.
I love thee freely, as men strive for Right;
I love thee purely, as they turn from Praise.
I love with a passion put to use
In my old griefs, and with my childhood's faith.
I love thee with a love I seemed to lose
With my lost saints, -- I love thee with the breath,
Smiles, tears, of all my life! -- and, if God choose,
I shall but love thee better after death.

Song of Solomon, the Old Testament
I am my beloveds and my beloved is mine . My beloved speaks and says to me:
Arise, my love, my fair one, and come away; for lo, the winter is past, the rain is over and gone. The flowers appear on the earth, the time of singing has come, and the voice of the turtledove is heard in our land. The fig tree puts forth its figs, and the vines are in blossom; they give forth fragrance.
Arise, my love, my fair one, and come away. I am my beloveds and my beloved is mine
O my dove, in the clefts of the rock, in the covert of the cliff, let me see your face, let me hear your voice, for your voice is sweet, and your face is comely. Set me as a seal upon your heart and seal upon your arm; for love is strong as death, jealousy cruel as the grave.
It flashes are flashes of fire, a most vehement flame. 

Many waters cannot quench love, neither can floods drown it. If a man offered for love all the wealth of his house, it would be utterly scorned. I am my beloveds and my beloved is mine.

(Ruth 1: 16-17)    Ruth said:
Entreat me not to leave thee, Or to return from following after thee:   For whither thou goest, I will go, And where thou lodgest, I will lodge. Thy people shall be my people, And thy God my God. Where thou diest, will I die, And there will I be buried.
The Lord do so to me, and more also, If ought but death part thee and me.

Apache Marriage Blessing
Now you will feel no rain, for each of you will be the shelter for each other. Now you will feel no cold, for each of you will be the warmth for the other. Now you are two persons, but there is only one life before. Go now to your dwelling place to enter into the days of your life together. And may your days be good and long upon the earth.

From 'Letters to a Young Poet    by Rainer Maria Rilke
For one human being to love another human being: that is perhaps the most difficult task that has been entrusted to us, the ultimate task, the final test and proof, the work for which all other work is merely preparation. Loving does not at first mean merging, surrendering, and uniting with another person - it is a high inducement for the individual to ripen, to become something in himself, to become world, to become world in himself for the sake of another person; it is a great, demanding claim on him, something that chose him and calls him to vast distances.

Blessings For A Marriage   by James Dillet Freeman
    May your marriage bring you all the exquisite excitements a marriage should bring, and may life grant you also patience, tolerance, and understanding.
   May you always need one another - not so much to fill your emptiness as to help you to know your fullness. A mountain needs a valley to be complete; the valley does not make the mountain less, but more; and the valley is more a valley because it has a mountain towering over it. So let it be with you and you.
    May you need one another, but not out of weakness.
    May you want one another, but not out of lack.
    May you entice one another, but not compel one another.
    May you embrace one another, but not out encircle one another.
    May you succeed in all important ways with one another, and not fail in the little graces.
    May you look for things to praise, often say, "I love you!" and take no notice of small faults.
    If you have quarrels that push you apart, may both of you have good sense enough to take the first step back.
    May you enter into the mystery, which is the awareness of one another's presence - no more physical than spiritual, warm and near when you are side-by-side, and warm and near when you are in separate rooms or even distant cities. May you have happiness, and may you find it making one another happy.
    May you have love, and may you find it loving one another.

Marriage Joins Two People In The Circle Of Its Love   by Edmund O'Neill
    Marriage is a commitment to life, the best that two people can find and bring out in each other. It offers opportunities for sharing and growth that no other relationship can equal. It is a physical and an emotional joining that is promised for a lifetime.
    Within the circle of its love, marriage encompasses all of life's most important relationships. A wife and a husband are each other's best friend, confidant, lover, teacher, listener, and critic. And there may come times when one partner is heartbroken or ailing, and the love of the other may resemble the tender caring of a parent for a child.
    Marriage deepens and enriches every facet of life. Happiness is fuller, memories are fresher, commitment is stronger, even anger is felt more strongly, and passes away more quickly.
    Marriage understands and forgives the mistakes life is unable to avoid. It encourages and nurtures new life, new experiences, and new ways of expressing a love that is deeper than life. When two people pledge their love and care for each other in marriage, they create a spirit unique unto themselves, which binds them, closer than any spoken or written words. Marriage is a promise, a potential made in the hearts of two people who love each other and takes a lifetime to fulfill.

True Love   Author Unknown
    True love is a sacred flame
    That burns eternally,
    And none can dim its special glow
    Or change its destiny.
    True love speaks in tender tones
    And hears with gentle ear,
    True love gives with open heart
    And true love conquers fear.
    True love makes no harsh demands
    It neither rules nor binds,
    And true love holds with gentle hands
    The hearts that it entwines.

Art of Marriage
    The little things are the big things.   It is never being too old to hold hands.
    It is remembering to say "I love you" at least once a day. It is never going to sleep angry.
    It is at no time taking the other for granted; the courtship should not end with the honeymoon, it should continue through all the years.
    It is having a mutual sense of values and common objectives. It is standing together facing the world.
    It is forming a circle of love that gathers in the whole family.
    It is doing things for each other, not in the attitude of duty or sacrifice, but in the spirit of joy.
    It is speaking words of appreciation and demonstrating gratitude in thoughtful ways.
    It is not expecting the husband to wear a halo or the wife to have wings of an angel.
    It is not looking for perfection in each other.   It is cultivating flexibility, patience, understanding and a sense of humor.
    It is having the capacity to forgive and forget.   It is giving each other an atmosphere in which each can grow.
    It is finding room for the things of the spirit.   It is a common search for the good and the beautiful.
    It is establishing a relationship in which the independence is equal, dependence is mutual and the obligation is reciprocal.
    It is not only marrying the right partner, it is being the right partner.

These I Can Promise    Author Unknown
I cannot promise you a life of sunshine;    I cannot promise riches, wealth, or gold;
I cannot promise you an easy pathway   That leads away from change or growing old.
But I can promise all my heart's devotion;   A smile to chase away your tears of sorrow;
A love that's ever true and ever growing - A hand to hold in yours through each tomorrow.

Touched By An Angel  -- Maya Angelou
We, unaccustomed to courage exiles from delight
live coiled in shells of loneliness until love leaves its high holy temple
and comes into our sight to liberate us into life.
Love arrives and in its train come ecstasies old memories of pleasure ancient histories of pain.
Yet if we are bold, love strikes away the chains of fear from our souls.
We are weaned from our timidity In the flush of love's light
we dare be brave And suddenly we see that love costs all we are
and will ever be.
Yet it is only love which sets us free.



On Love By Thomas Kempis
    Love is a mighty power,   a great and complete good.
    Love alone lightens every burden, and makes rough places smooth.
    It bears every hardship as though it were nothing, and renders all bitterness sweet and acceptable.
    Nothing is sweeter than love,   Nothing stronger,   Nothing higher,   Nothing wider,   Nothing more pleasant, Nothing fuller or better in heaven or earth; for love is born of God.
    Love flies, runs and leaps for joy.   It is free and unrestrained.   Love knows no limits, but ardently transcends all bounds.
    Love feels no burden, takes no account of toil, attempts things beyond its strength.
    Love sees nothing as impossible, for it feels able to achieve all things.
    It is strange and effective, while those who lack love faint and fail.
    Love is not fickle and sentimental, nor is it intent on vanities.
    Like a living flame and a burning torch, it surges upward and surely surmounts every obstacle.

Celtic Wedding Blessing
    May your mornings bring joy and your evenings bring peace.
    May your troubles grow few as your blessings increase.
    Be no worse than the happiest day of your past.
    May your hands be forever clasped in friendship
    And your hearts joined forever in love.
    Your lives are very special,
    God has touched you in many ways.
    May his blessings rest upon you
    And fill all your coming days.